Me, and the trees

I always longed to make my roots somewhere.

To feel I was belonging to someplace. Having the conviction I could find peace when in a precise spatial delineation within the universe, coordinated by geographical points;

And nowhere else.

Then I heard life saying:
The trees, they are outside!

Grab your arm. Clench it: it hurts. Skin changing color. Flesh sweating, swelling, smelling.
Arms pointing, holding who you love, stretching to turn off the air on the plane that is only on your face, stretching when you wake up in the morning. Those branches you possess unravelling towards the above, the undiscovered, the infinite possibilities, collecting the oxygen that makes your blood run, faster;

And I looked around, and I was possibly by myself, surely within myself: but nowhere where I had to be.

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Number 20

Rise!
     I’m standing already
     I didn’t see you coming
Do you want me here?
     What am I now?
Can I hold your hand?
     Please go, bring your affections with you
     I don’t need any
Are you angry?
     It is my face, it can’t wrinkle in a smile
     Why does it hurt
I brought you chocolate
I brought you an addiction that doesn’t bleed
     I am sick and tired of compassion
     Please wake me up
Do you think you are the only one?
Don’t you think I’ve thought about it too?
     I didn’t consider the now
     Now that it all returns back to me
I mean I’d never, I guess
Did you mean it?
     How fun
     It’s sunny today
Please let me believe you were asking for help
     It feels warm on the tip of my nose
I would have come anyways
     And it is November
I would have swiped your troubles away
     I thought it was winter already
I would have at least tried to
     Those flowers next to my bed
     Have no roots
Try to let me in
     You are not my family
Yes! Look at me
     I feel cold now
Don’t ignore me
     Get me the blanket
Why did you give up
     Those blank spaces
Take, you are shivering
I still need to fill
It is never too late
To be happy again
     With more chapters of a life
     I am afraid to continue